Dear Gabby,
I’m 24, and live by myself in a bachelor pad. My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year now, and everything’s great, we almost never fight – except about my work situation, and, of all things, my bathroom. She’s threatened to leave me before if I didn’t get a job, but I knew she was bluffing, and she’s not going anywhere. I assure her I have enough money to last until my career takes off, and that getting a regular job would just get in the way – and we’d see each other less. And she actually cried about the state of my bathroom. Personally, I don’t think it’s that dirty. I mean, I know it’s not spotless, but it doesn’t smell, and it’s actually way cleaner that my other guy friends’. So, am I crazy, or is she crazy? Or is it a bit of both?
Sincerely,
Calling Her Bluff
Dear Calling Her Bluff,
Do you even hear yourself? You’re making excuses instead of getting things done, and frankly, it sounds like you would choose your own laziness over your girlfriend. Try to put yourself in her shoes, and imagine how she must feel.
Your bathroom is probably symbolic to your girlfriend of your relationship. If you can’t be bothered to clear your own bathroom, she might conclude any number of things about you, including that you’ll never change, succeed in life, and she may even possibly conclude that you do not love her anymore. And I wouldn’t be using your friends’ bathrooms as a defense, because I’m guessing she doesn’t think very much of them either. Am I right?
I don’t know how big your savings are, but your own bachelor pad in a big city can’t be all that cheap, and if you don’t do something about your work situation soon, you’ll wind up losing your girlfriend, and your apartment, and you’ll be unemployed, single, and living with your parents. See how easy it is to get a date then.
I wouldn’t say either of you are crazy, but it sounds like she’s crazy about you, so if love her, consider these things she asks of you to be symbolic of your love.
